There are lots of songs no one should have to ever hear again. Heck, the entire catalogues of certain artists (Insane Clown Posse, Matchbox 20) and even entire genres (thrash metal, polka, Christian Rap) that largely are, with good reason, utterly verboten... But the parameters here are for popular songs that are sooOOO overplayed, they should never pollute the sonic realm ever again.
In no particular order:
"Sweet Home Alabama" Lynyrd Skynyrd - besides the name of their band sucking to the umpteenth power, this guitar-twanging anthem somewhat reminiscent of Deliverance's "Dueling Banjos" makes the notion of being sodomized by Rednecks more appealing than having to listen to this garbage. The tune is irritating, the chorus' appeal preys on the most simplistic, Chro-magnon urges to say something (anything!) in unison, and if you genuinely like this song we may not be able to be friends anymore.
Skynard's Decor of Choice
"Baby Got Back" Sir Mix-a-Lot- this song had its day, but that day has long passed. I don't think the demographic of "flat-ass-loving" guys have much of a voice anymore, so mission: accomplished; let's stop playing it already! Did we ever find out who knighted Sir Mix-a-lot, by the way?
"I Will Always Love You" Whitney Houston- I possibly hate this song more than I've ever hated anything. I think the chorus (the "I..e-I...e-I..." part, UGH) is the literally the worst sound to ever be heard ANYWHERE. My hell would be to spend eternity trapped in a room with this song playing.
First choice for "Kill Whitney Houston" in Google Image Search
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That is all that comes to mind at the moment, but worry not; there will be sequels to this post.
You don't have to watch all nine minutes and change to get the gist of it; Chris Matthews is very, VERY angry. But then again, it's perfectly reasonable to take umbrage with the notion of an official elected to our nation's Congress making statements exposing their complete ignorance of American History. Michele Bachmann in particular is very highly lauded by the Tea Party and other members of the far right, yet she actually thinks our Founding Fathers were anti-slavery. Pitiful, disappointing and just plain stupid are a few unequivocal descriptors that come to mind. Shame on you, Congresswoman Bachmann.
Yet it's my opinion that Matthews crossed the line. Despite that I agree with his outrage over the fact that we live in a nation where people of questionable intellect hold elected office with what seems like a high frequency, he is a supposed newsman/commentator/moderator/whatever you want to call him. People of such stature should hold themselves to a higher standard while on the air.
Chris, control your emotions, man! Tirelessly berating Tea Party co-founder Sal Russo, as fun as we all know tormenting Tea Partiers can be, is no way to get your point across. Practice composure when you expose the party's ignorance and hypocrisy and their likely-flimsy response will play right into your argument.
Now we have Glenn Beck coming to the defense of the Congresswoman (who does a great job of combining Sarah Palin's empty stare with former Florida Attorney General Katherine Harris' awful makeup) with his GENIUS assertion that the Three-Fifths Compromise was intended to destroy slavery. With "reporting" like that, how does this man even have a following and what can we do to make him go away?
But wait! On another note, someone named Joanne Bamberger seems to think Matthews' repeated use of the term "balloonhead" in regards to Bachmann was sexist. http://www.politicsdaily.com/2011/01/26/michele-bachmann-is-a-balloon-head-in-chris-matthews-book/ Uh, just because it was directed at a woman by a man does not automatically make it sexist. And just because he made a previous comment about Sarah Palin that, quite frankly is borderline at best, in my opinion, does not cause any remarks he makes about women here forth fall into the same category.
Despite my relative ambivalence to Bill O'Reilly's frequent use of the word "Pinhead," if it did upset me, I'd be very presumptuous to decry it as sexist were it to be used against a woman. (This gets me thinking, could a Pinhead potentially pop a Balloonhead? Because we should have chaperons if the two are thinking about getting cozy any time soon...)
Matthews is right about Michele Bachmann; the contrary argument does not hold up, Glenn Beck. Regardless of one's past scathing remarks, a "Baloonhead" does not a sexist make, Ms. Bamberger. The whole point is that Matthews had a lay-up to make a good point, but he missed it.
It's been less than a week since Warner Bros. revealed the villains in the next Batman film to be Catwoman (played by Anne Hathaway) and Bane (Tom Hardy). Catwoman we're all familiar with, but, for those of you not in the know, Bane is a former Latin American prisoner fueled by "Venom," a potent steroid that calls to mind a resemblance to late 90's Mark McGwire.
I figured I'd use this as an opportunity to get my plot predictions out there early, that way if I'm wrong, my incorrectness will simply fade away into the vast echo-chamber that is the blogosphere, but if I'm correct, deity-status will be bestowed upon me within the comic book community (which is kinda like being a four-foot guy in midgetville, but I digress...)
So here's what I'm thinking: Bane is most famously known as the man that broke Bruce Wayne's back (literally snapped him over his knee like Bo Jackson's bat after a strikeout), so that's just what he'll do. Yes, Christian Bale will be wheelchair-bound shortly after the first act break. He'll be just like the Big Lebowski, only the loss of his legs will be credited to a steroid-induced freak instead of that "Chinaman" in Korea.
During his rehab, Catwoman will emerge as another vigilante, but Gotham will fall deeper in turmoil without that sweet brand o' Bat-Justice they've become so accustomed to. Right before the third act, Bruce will walk again, a la former New York Jet Dennis Byrd, and return to kick butt and close out the trilogy.
You've heard it here first: the "Rises" in the title has to do with rising from a wheelchair, which is definitely the hardest type of "rising" on the "rising scale" (which goes from "bread" to "wheelchair," in case anyone asks...)
